It took me all year to find my goal for 2021.

When I try to wrap my head around this year, my brain says, "What the heck just happened?" I have a hard time thinking about all the changes my 40th year brought. Every year, I pick a word to focus on with a list of goals. The last year was "expressivity." I remember very clearly what my goals were and what they meant to me. By March, half my goals were cancelled. Visit the ocean and the mountains. Nope. Attend at least four concerts. Think again sister. Spend more time in the gym taking more group classes. Closed. The kids were sad when they realized they wouldn't be going to school or theater and cheer practice. Plays cancelled. Competitions cancelled. Warmer weather was coming so at least we would could be outside. But it seemed that the hits kept on coming. In June, my grandpa passed away, which marked the lowest of the low points this year.

I think this year hardened everyone a little bit, including me. I found a lot of comfort in journaling each day. And with that, I went back to my goals from the beginning of the year. One in particular stood out, but it needed to be modified. It was , "Stop accepting and tolerating less than you deserve." Let's start with one word. The word "deserve" doesn't sit right to me. Who am I to say what I deserve? I am human. I make mistakes, say the wrong things, jump to conclusions, can be insecure, hurt people's feelings, lose my patience, and many others I can list. BUT!!! Despite all of my flaws, I am allowed to want more for myself. So then I was at, "Stop accepting and tolerating less than you want." It still felt unfinished. It felt negative. I realized I started the year less optimistic than I felt I was! And whoa! With that I changed the whole sentence. I changed stop to start, got rid of tolerating, and kept rewriting until it was exactly what I wanted it to be. And while I can fit the story in one blog, this took some time to get right to this point.......

Start working hard for exactly what you want for yourself.

I hadn't wanted anything for myself in a long time. When I started taking pictures, it was just a hobby. Then it turned into a little bit of an obsession to get better. I started taking some online classes. (So while they weren't gym classes, I guess I half met one goal.) I started shooting anyone who would let me. I loved every second of it, from shooting to editing. Then I started investing more in my education and equipment. What did I want from all of this? It was an important question my husband asked. I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to be my own boss. I want to be a photographer. I want to make people smile. I want to help them make memories.

So 2021, you have no choice other than to be a better year. I have so much to learn. More shooting, more editing, social media, marketing, building a new list is long. But I will work hard to get exactly what I want.

Thank you to each of you for your support. You helped me get here and I won't forget that!

Wishing you the best of everything,

Darcy Weaver, Photographer